I’m watching Clint Eastwood tonight.  And if you don’t like Clint, be warned, because a hand might reach out of this computer screen and punch you.



Hollywood has given us lots of tough-as-nails, unshaven badasses over the years.  They play by their own rules and are regarded by fat, cigar-chomping police chiefs as “loose cannons.”  But none of these loose cannons were ever as crazy balls-tough as Clint Eastwood.  This guy has defined rugged masculinity for the last 50 years.  He was Dirty Harry, the cop who ate a sandwich while shooting seven people, then intimidated the eighth until he peed himself.  As the Man With No Name in spaghetti westerns, he was the poncho-wearing, cigarillo-smoking tough guy whose turn-ons include not saying anything and riding into town killing everyone.



We all know Clint Eastwood is old now.  The fact that he’s 82 years old is actually pretty alarming.  The life expectancy of an American male is only 75.  Clint’s living on borrowed time, statistically speaking.  The truth is that the man known for asking punks if they feel lucky is now more likely to ask himself the same question every time he gets out of bed or goes to the bathroom.

Maybe that’s why he’s closed the book on his acting career, with his final role having been that of a racist old guy in 2008’s Gran Torino.  It was his highest grossing film.  In that movie, Clint spends most of his time drinking beer, making gunfingers, spouting every racial slur possible and telling kids to get off his lawn.  Clint also delivers the funniest joke I’ve ever heard when he says, “Oh, I’ve got one.  A Mexican, a Jew, and a colored guy go into a bar.  The bartender looks up and says, “Get the fuck out of here.”



In reality, Clint Eastwood is not a grouchy old racist.  But he does hate liberals and once threatened to kick Michael Moore’s fat ass.  He’s also an accomplished jazz musician, winner of 5 Academy Awards, and a notorious womanizer who has fathered at least 7 children with five different women.



Which is why I’ve chosen 1971’s Play Misty For Me as the movie to watch tonight.  It was his first directorial effort, the one that turned a 40-year-old action star into a serious filmmaker, and the film that best defines the real Clint Eastwood.

A girl calls up every night at about the same time and asks the disc jockey to play Misty for her.  Some nights he does.  Clint is the all-night voice at a small station in Carmel who plays records, reads poems, and hopes to fix his life some day.  After work one night, he picks up a girl in a bar.  Or maybe she picks him up.  She’s the girl who likes Misty.  She is also batshit crazy and has a thing for knives.

Pass the popcorn, please.




2 thoughts on “PLAY MISTY FOR ME

  1. Bravo Clint, bravo. I think it’s an amazing an awesome accomplishment for Clint to have the ” I will act the way I want, say what I want and do what I want mentality” and still be successful at it for over 50 plus years in a huge liberaltard fuelled Hollywood who will excile you to a non inhabited island for so much as a hint or an assumption that you might be a conservative.

    I like that you brought of the movie Grand Torino. What an awesome movie. Clint knew that thers still a high percentage of Americans who desperately wanted/needed a gritty as nails I’m still proud to be an American and I’m not going anywhere kind of movie.

    Although Clints Character did in fact spend most of his time Drinking large quanitys of beer, making gunfingers, spouting racial slurs and ignoring the fact that he was producing massive amounts of blood every time he coughed threw out the movie he did have a secrete meaning/message to his movie.

    To me Clints message was that America is sissified, lazy and to influenced by technology. Kids now days are more interested in what’s on facebook, Twitter and television than what’s actully going on in the world or news. When’s the next device coming out? Pick up a Damn book! Once you pick it up read it and lean something. Like maybe how to fix a Grand Torino? Put down the video game controller, cell phone and I-Pad. Go outside and expierience life, birds, trees and nature and shit. Interact with an actual human being instead of a computer screen. Shit, learn some damn social skills for Christ sake! Get of job. Earn your own money instead of depending on mommy and daddy and learn some self worth. Take responsibility for your actions and be proud of who you are and where you come from. Have confidence in yourself and you abilities. To me that’s the kind of message Clint was trying to send. Hopefully it was received and received well.

    • Yeah, damn straight. But don’t be a know-it-all punk, dude. Clint Eastwood’s know-it-all punk policies are well documented. And here’s one for you: How about Clint as the new Batman. Huh? I bet that concept just made one of your testicles explode.

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